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Verizon iPhone 4: Don’t Board the Train Just Yet!

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It would appear that earlier this year, hell froze over and pigs didn’t just fly, but were launched into orbit.  Verizon announced that the coveted iPhone would be available in its warm loving arms.  The muttering demand for the Verizon iPhone has been around since forever.  As alcohol has been an integral part of creating epic nights and deep regrets, the iPhone has been an integral part to the lives of hell… everyone.  From hipsters to tech geeks, from teenyboppers to sensible people (like Swagger readers), it seems everyone has one.

Well, not everyone; with the biggest bottleneck of all, AT&T’s actual wireless service, the large, but short bus carrier has successfully raised a generation of mobile phone users with the patience of saints.  The patience to deal with recurring, but minor technical problems, like dropped calls every other conversation, and lack of service in distant and remote areas, such as downtown in any large metropolitan city.  Actually, my mistake, you, the sensible person wouldn’t put up with that sort of bull.

So with Verizon’s fantastic announcement, of course this bodes nothing but steak and tits for everyone right?  Wrong.   We here at Swagger care not just about your social life, but your sanity as well.  Here are a few reasons why you should  sit on those hands and not immediately pick up that Verizon iPhone:

  • While Verizon’s new 4G LTE service is sure to be, for lack of better words, the shit, iPhone owners will have to play like the fat kids do and sit this one out on their new 2-year contracts.  Apple refrained from making the necessary changes to support 4G, so until that 5th gen comes out, you’re stuck.
  • For AT&T converts, sorry for the bad news, but your current iPhone 4 is incompatible with Verizon.  You’re probably going to need to refrain from that extra back room dance for the $199.00 early termination fee, then pay whatever Verizon wants for the iPhone + new contract.
  • Without going too deeply into the tech side of things, Verizon runs on CDMA while AT&T runs on GSM.  The big difference between the two networks is how data and voice are transferred.  For AT&T, data and voice transfer simultaneously.  Years ago, Verizon’s engineers decided to have their CDMA network transfer data and voice separately, meaning, if you are on the phone, you can’t access data.  We get that you don’t necessarily need to be on the phone while looking up directions, and checking out the naughty pictures your lady friend left for you in your dropbox, but it sucks that data transfer will halt as soon as your phone rings.  As awesome as Verizon’s new Hotspot feature will be (where you can connect up to 5 devices to your phone as a wireless hub), there’s no point if the phone rings and everyone gets booted off immediately.  This is also sure to cause transfer speed problems.
  • And finally, with the iPhone 5 just around the corner with its promises for sunshine and rainbows to come, the iPhone 4 is starting to look a little dated.  Like a Vegas elope, the last thing you want is to lock yourself into a strict contract when that new bit of tail er… tech comes along:  (iPhone 5 rumors)
  • It’s been reported that the iPhone 5 may come in three different flavors:  the standard iPhone 5 upgrade, a keyboard variant, and a smaller, cheaper Nano variant as well.

  • The iPhone 5 will go from a lacking 3.5 inch screen to a full 4 inch display to match the seemingly billions of Android competitors popping up like daisies.  In short, size matters.
  • There are hints in the iP5 coding that point towards media streaming features.  With rumors of the iPhone Nano completely running on Cloud with little to no onboard memory, this paints an interesting scenario as technology moves towards Cloud computing and the potential for higher interconnectivity becomes more prominent.
  • The iPhone 5 will supposedly kick it up a few pegs with the use of a custom dual-core A8 processor (upgraded from the current A4).  Bottom line, more is better.
  • And finally, rumors of even SPACIER technology such as gesture controls and near-field communication (using your phone as a credit card), doing plebian tasks such as touching your phone to make it function and swiping your credit card will be far beyond the iPhone 5 owner’s daily duties.

I love the iPhone.  I love Verizon’s service.  But for the time being, don’t pay more for a slower functioning iPhone than those crazy AT&T users.

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